Saturday, 30 June 2007

West Coast CDC Consortium Awards evening

Thursday 28th June saw this year's awards ceremony. These are held yearly to celebrate the achievement of all learners at the centre.

Learners and their guests were welcomed by the Maitre'd (That would be Clive) who directed them to the free bar where a glass of wine was offered by the two delectable bar staff (Debbie and Julie) Julie brought a wealth of expertise to the role as she has worked at the Seacote in Silloth. Debbie spent the evening grinning at fond recollections of lyrics she had been singing all day (something about bags and dancing)

Joanne started the evening by welcoming everyone and introducing the star guest. Peter Routledge, learndirect area manager, gave a short speech congratulating everyone for all their hard work.

Proceedings were then held up slightly while a new battery was sought for the camera.

The centre tutors then presented learners with certificates in groups. Val, Janet, Liz, Tracy, Clive, Joanne and Ron all welcomed learners to the stage and photographs were taken

One or two of the women learners threw themselves at Peter's feet. You could tell Clive and Ron were getting jealous, until we realised that the steps were a bit high. At which point Ron was asked to provide a helping hand to prevent an accident. Many were grateful for the assistance, especially Alan Baird who held his hand a little tooo long ;-))

Once all certificates had been presented, Peter was thanked and presented with a small gift from one of our youngest leaners (Mhairi)

We retired to the buffet table for sandwiches and pie

Joanne, the centre manager said to her staff

"Thank you very much for all your hard work in last nights awards ceremony. The night was a great success and Jen has emailed the Times and Star with a picture (complete ECDL students) and a statement so look out for this in next Friday’s addition. I would like to make a special thanks to Julie for doing all the arrangements for the learners to come, buffet, glasses, drinks, presents. I know its hard work but Julie does it so well, so well even that when Clive and Janet came in early and Val and I return from our meeting to help there was nothing left for them to do (great we had time to have a coffee before the evening started). All we had to do was enjoy the evening. "

Thursday, 28 June 2007

Romance mathematics

Not much happening at the moment so thought i would give you some maths to do instead

Smart man + smart woman = romance
Smart man + dumb woman = affair
Dumb man + smart woman = marriage
Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + dumb employee = production
Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion
Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.
A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.
To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

Married men live longer than single men do, but married men are a lot more willing to die.

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.

Sunday, 24 June 2007

The Weekend

Laura had a good weekend - a practice for her Silver Duke of Edinburgh award. Well, at least she did not give herself food poisoning ;-))

Around 18 students trekked and camped at Eskdale all returned with sore feet and fond memories of Laura's Thermals.

Hayden also had a good weekend. He was the only boy at a party on Friday night. Just him and five girls on trampolines, swimming pools, ten pin bowling. A Chip off the old bock? Nah -I would have run a mile

I and friends from work at a lovely meal at Casa Romana' s at Whitehaven. Thanks to Laura I advised them all to be careful when ordering chicken (Pollo)

The photo's on the left show every one in a happy mood. And you can even see Jen and Debbie having an intellectual conversation. They were whispering at the time. Fortunately I can lip read. Debbie was saying to Jen - "I wish he would point that bloody camera somewhere else"

Unfortunately I did not have the camera ready for the best picture of the evening, when the waiter told Clive there was no draught bitter - just a bottle (Belgian I think). Actually no, the best picture would have been when Clive tasted it)

Conversation was good and included who we would like to join us (Robbie Williams was top of some peoples' list - Can you guess who?), holidays (and why i hate going abroad), the disappointing olives (And me suddenly realising where olive oil comes from -doh)

There was much frivolity from two rather disturbing conversations.

The first had everyone in hysterics over Debbie and Tracy's recollections of their mothers falling over . Yes, that is right, everyone laughing at two women falling - disgraceful. But wine had been flowing at that point (Or pints of lager for Debbie)

The second most haughty moment was , well all I can say is tinned whipped cream, and I am leaving it at that

And I can say even less about the story of wet shoes!!!!!

Thanks all for a lovely time, and looking forward to the Quince and Medlar - at least i will be able to have a drink

Thursday, 21 June 2007

Laura's tipsy

Just got back from picking Laura up at St Bees. There was an end of exams party / barbecue at a friends house. Laura's voice was a bit 'slurry' but apparently she is just tired!

Haven't we all tried that one?
Val kindly sent me this picture. She said it would look good on my blog as a self portrait!!
OOo I say Misses - the cheek of it - lol
I will have to scan in that photo of her that i found in the paper a few years ago - Fiona has a copy of it somewhere
A quick puzzle for you:
Look at each of the following words, there is a connection between them. What is it?
Leave a comment with your answer - a prize to the first correct answer

Wednesday, 20 June 2007

Some jokes

Nothing much happening today.

So some Jokes

First, one from Val:

There once was pirate captain who, whenever it looked like a battle would be imminent would change into a red shirt. After observing this behavior for a few months, one of the crew members asked him what it meant.
"It's in case I get shot. I don't want you crew members to see blood and freak out."
"That's very sensible, sir." At that moment, the crew member spotted eight hostile ships on the horizon. The captain all of a sudden looked very concerned.
"Get my brown pants."

And one from me:

Britney Watches the Birdie

Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake were walking on the beach. Justin said, "Hey Britney, look at that dead birdie!"
Britney looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"

Monday, 18 June 2007

The Twins

The newest additions to the family. Isobel and Emily. Twin daughters to Steve, first grandchild to Carol and gt grandchild to Ken

Look good kids!

Sunday, 17 June 2007

Father's Day

Well, a fairly quiet weekend really.

We went to Caspian on Friday for our weekly Pizza fix. Saturday, not much happening

On Sunday went for a walk to Ashness Bridge and Suprise View - in the rain. Picnic's are always fun in the rain don't you think?

Much of the weekend though has been about Britain's got Talent. Got to say, I really love Ant and Dec ;-)

Fathers day brought some slippers, socks, a bottle of beer and a box of maltersers. All required for a change! Best of all though was a home made card of Hayden, and just look at what he did with the picture. Hey, I AM Francis Rossi! - That's me that is

Well off for that Beer now, and the final of Talent - I reckon Connie will win

Thursday, 14 June 2007

The morning after the night before.....

saw lots of sore heads and rumbling tums.

The girls departed the coach at Val's house and were invited in for a night cap...

...or two

Apparently this is called team building <>

OFSTED inspection at Beckstone seems to be going well, and our own Star (Clive) entertained an inspector for part of the afternoon with 'painting' on the computer. I was worried they may have wanted to see me, but fortunately they did not. Instead I had my own 'inspector'. Jen observed me doing some numeracy in ICT as part of her Adult Numeracy report. I hope it was okay Jen , did I make any mistakes?

When I got home there was a strange man in the kitchen looking very sheepish. Apparently just doing final measurements for a new kitchen. I think he thought I may not have known about it. Fiona pretended to start cooking the tea, until he had left and then she told me to take over ;-))

This site looks good for ECDL resources and practice tests, and all free


Wednesday, 13 June 2007

Learndirect Awards

A great day out with friends at the Bolton Wanderers Reebok stadium. We travelled via coach, making a tasty stop at Tebay Services for a hearty (if early) lunch. Valerie managed, just about, to prevent her pickled onions going walkabout over the table.

The journey continued with much discussion about Gordon Ramsay, Favourite films, great recipes, Desperate housewives and very little about work

We arrived over an hour early, and so took the opportunity to visit the local shops. I declined the offer to join the ladies in NEXT, so I wandered the book, entertainment and electrical stores.

Val bought a tasty little handbag for her sisters birthday

On to the awards and we were all eager with anticipation of coming away with at least one. After all we had nominations against four of the seven categories.

Firstly the centre award for innovation - we were pipped at the post

Next on to the Learning for Employment award. Helen Banton was nominated, but unfortunately pipped at the post also

The Progression award was next with Ron (AKA Richard Hewer) once again being a runner up.

All our hopes were on David Hine for the Outstanding Learner Award. We were so confident. But unfortunately it was not to be. Another runner up

Whilst that looks like failure, we do not class it as that. The achievement was getting their in the first place, so well done to all involved.

We were then treated to a (poor) buffet and some entertainment. Jugglers and magicians wandered around. We all tried our hands at juggling, some were even successful (well done Julie).

The magician was phenomenal. Card tricks - very good. But the trick with the ring. Val gave her ring to the man, who held it in his fist. He then withdrew a key wallet, only to show the ring had disappeared from his hand an re-appeared in the wallet - attached to a key ring holder. Fantastic

And don't even ask about Julie and the limes! (Excuse me can I have a fell of your two limes?)

The coach trip home was time for reflection and celebration. Thanks to Joanne and Julie (Anyone else?) we had plenty of wine and nibbles. The coach seats also managed to get a drink thanks to the hopeless attempts at pouring in a mobile vehicle . Sorry, thanks to the very erratic driving!

Thanks everyone for great company all day

Tuesday, 12 June 2007

Laura's revision

Laura is doing quite well with her exams (at least that is what she says)

She is most of the way through now, and has spent today working hard with her boyfriend (sorry friend who happens to be a boy) revising Chemistry

Yeh - right!

I was that age once you know ;-)

The neighbours were not happy when she was trying her new trampoline out this morning - at 6.15 am!!!!


Oh Dear

It just cost a packet. never mind I suppose it keeps us all safe in our travels. I love the car - well actually it's a 4*4 - but a little one for a little man (HOnda CRV) very relaible would recommend them to anyone

Had two of these, but perhaps it is time for a change - a motorbike perhaps ;-)))


Hi all

this is my first blog and my first entry.

Wow, an online diary for me, and allows others to see it also.

All my thoughts are currently on ITQ - a new qualification we are engaging with. Looks good and simple, and the best bit is the excellent online e-portfolio.

Outside of work, enjoying playing my guitar (Bass) and we have just bought a trampoline - how high can this old tub get? Not very